The Mandarin and the Other Relatives

The Relatives and us

We were still meant to visit other relatives in Toronto that night. We had spent the entire day driving around with no clear destination. On the way back to Toronto from Barrie, it was decided that we would go to the Mandarin for dinner without going home first, as we were running out of time. Andrew didn’t hear this and told us so many times once he realised that was what we were doing. 

Andrew was so bad at directions that he said we needed to be in the far left lane to get off the 400. Kim, thinking what I was thinking, stayed in the middle lane and exited off on the right. We then missed a turn because he thought both lanes turned at this intersection, but it was only 1. He is an idiot.

The Mandarin is a Chinese restaurant that apparently fed people for free on Canada day a few years ago and Marion and Andrew got their fill on that occasion. I wasn’t feeling hungry and when I saw what was on offer I didn’t feel any hungrier. For Chinese food it looked very western orientated. The decor of the place was horrid with stuffed animals lining the divides of the restaurant. The place was huge, possibly holding more than 120 people over several sections. We didn’t like it there. To top it off we got some really tacky souvenirs from the place as we left. They were giving them away. Kim refuses to look at them to this day.

We were meant to be going to meet more relatives that evening, but Marion wanted to show Kim a big craft store. They couldn’t decide when they would stop in there and eventually Kim said we will stop there now before we make it to the relatives.

Side note: Earlier in the day we had found out that Andrews car boot doesn’t lock. Something that should have been told to us before we left our valuable camera gear in it. After we found this out our gear went with us wherever we went.

The store wasn’t much and we were soon on our way to the other relatives. They rang Andrew seeing where we were and he wasn’t going to answer, but eventually he did and he told them some bullshit story about just leaving Niagara. Then Andrew couldn’t direct us to their house, as he never went this way to their house, he only came away from their house in this direction. We did manage to get there but Kim and I were donkeys on the edge at this point. Thankfully the other relatives were quite normal and we told them of our travels with and without Marion and Andrew.

Upon returning to and entering Marion and Andrew’s house, Andrew exclaimed “theres’ that smell again, Marion”. Kim replied, “it’s cat piss”, with a fair amount of tone. Andrew “I only cleaned the litter tray out the other day”. Kim (in her mind and later told to me) “the cat is going to piss more than once every couple of days you moron”.

This whole Cat Piss conversation set Marion and Andrew off as they regaled us with the story of the Spider Cat. Apparently a cat got into the entrance of their apartment, scaled the six-foot wall to the ledge, and pissed on the wall. This is extremely hard to believe, but it does conjure up images of a cat dressed in a spiderman costume entering homes and peeing in inappropriate places.

Again we got home late and didn’t get to bed until after midnight. That night Kim reassured me that her Aunt and Uncle in Scotland were nothing like Marion and Andrew, which I was wondering as we were meant to be staying with them for several nights when we arrived in Scotland. We also contemplated leaving Marion and Andrew’s and getting a hotel room. We were close to doing this the previous night and tonight the urge was even greater. Against our better judgment, we stayed with Marion and Andrew, but we were taking charge tomorrow. We had enough of their incompetent organising and we weren’t going to stand for it any longer.

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